I wrote an article a few weeks ago, where I outlined some dating tips. Specifically, it was how not to get tossed into a friendzone. I thought I’d follow that up with a post that outlines something that should seem obvious, but I was never able to cram it into my cranium until much later in life.
One of the things that goes through a guy’s head when he’s looking at a perfect specimen of femininity, is that she is somehow perfect. She’s too put together to even lower herself to his level, so why even try. This is complete and utter bull. Those gals are just as fucked up as the rest of us.
Now, obviously there are some that even if they are heavily flawed, they will not admit so. These gals are the stuck up witches that you could act nice to, and they will look down their noses at you. Screw em. Those aren’t the ladies I’m referring to, and if they are under the delusion that their place is high above you, then you don’t want them anyway. Let them end up with douchebags and learn the hard way. I have no use for them, and until they can get their ass off the pedestal, you don’t either.
When I was a kid, I always thought of certain people as better. I’m not sure why I had this delusion. I grew up in a house in the country. I mean coun-try. The road we lived on was made of dirt. The house I grew up in, my father built. So when I was younger, the people living in beautiful brick houses, in beautiful suburbs, with beautifully kept lawn seemed like they were just a bit better. They never seemed to have problems, always had nicely washed and pressed clothes, and with a few exceptions, always had parents that drove BMW’s.
So in my mind, these kids didn’t worry about being popular, they just seemed to BE more popular. (This is coming from one of the far less popular kids. My dog was my only friend for a very long time.) Popular kids never seemed to have problems, but here’s what I learned much later in life. They did, they were just better at hiding them.
Jump forward to today.
See that beautiful creature in the bar? See how she looks like she plays 3 instruments, and was just born with a perfect body, and never had to study in school, and how she just seems to have the face that has never known about how complicated and hard life can be? HA! She does.
I learned when I only started flirting with the best looking gal in the bar, that tons of them had, or had dealt with people in their family, with eating disorders. They had popped pills when they couldn’t sleep, and popped more pills to wake them up. More than I was comfortable had done, and were doing coke to keep up with the lifestyle that was imposed on them. Many of them were neurotic. Some had OCD about their apartments being clean, and other apartments were so filthy, that I piled my clothes on top of my shoes, so my underwear wouldn’t touch the gunk on the carpets.
I’ve dated women with daddy issues. I’ve dated women with so much credit card debit that they couldn’t make minimum payments. I’ve dated women that had been abused, and orphaned. I’ve dated women that had so many issues that they broke down in tears as soon as things started to crack in their perfect facade, and the overwhelming portion of the women with these issues were just like that beautiful creature you are thinking of in the bar. (Yes, even THAT one.)
My point here is simple. A lot of guys will not approach women, which seem to be well put together and beautiful. You psych yourself out, by assuming that they can’t possibly have any use for a chump like you. This is where you are wrong. Many of those gals have issues in part, because they have dealt with assholes in their life. Now go introduce yourself, and help break that cycle.
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