Greg's fastest and worst date... ever.

   I had a date tonight.  That in itself isn't a rare thing.  I have a set of rules for dating that in part, contain something like this:  I'll go on a first date with anyone.  As long as they want to go out, I'll give them a day in "court".  I like this policy, because I've found that many ladies that I thought I'd like, turned out to be ladies I would not entertain on a second date.  Also, many ladies that I thought for SURE would be one time dates turned into many dates.   You never know, ya know?

   This is why people think it's amazing (but if you do the math, it's not) that years ago, I knew that I had been on over 1,000 first dates.  Take an extroverted flirty man, who doesn't see what the big deal is about walking up and asking a girl out, add enough time, shake lightly -  1,000 first dates.  I mean really... what's the big deal.  It's really a game of numbers.  If you (speaking to both the guys and gals here) are in a bar, or club, or on the street, or on a bus, or in Denny's and see an attractive person, why not ask them out?  Best case- you get the person's number.  Worst case - you don't get their number.  The negatives are the exact same if you ask or sit there, but the positives only move upward if you get out of your chair (or "scoot" closer to theirs, in the case of the bus).  You have nothing to lose except a little self esteem, but A) that self esteem is boosted when you DO get the number of the pretty girl/handsome guy, and B) if they say no, then they were obviously intimidated by your awesomeness.  Win/Win.

   In the spirit of that, I will tell you what is to date, the fastest date I was ever on, the fastest time from asking out to going on the date, and the worst date of all time (for me).   I bring this story up, because as I said earlier, I had a date tonight.  I met this most recent lady through an online dating site (OKCupid), and we have talked a few times.  Yes, a dating site may seem odd, but every one of you have looked at them, so don't give me that "down the nose" look.  So I talked to her for a week or so, and we were going to go catch some coffee and food.  While talking, we realized that I know a guy she works with through her job.  Today, she talked to him (fishing for info, which was cute) and he casually mentioned that years ago, I dated a black girl.  She sent me a text asking if it was true, I said yes and asked why, to which she replied that that was gross, and she didn't want to go out with me tonight.  "Thanks! You saved me $30.00!" was my reply. 

Regardless, here is the epic story:

   So, there I was, strolling through a mall in Little Rock, Arkansas.  I was walking with my recently purchased goods, when I passed this particular girl.  I didn't see her when she passed, because I was trying to not run into the 3 billion people around me, but when she passed, I caught her smell.  (It should be noted that it's rare for me to really flip over perfume.)  I stopped, turned, and while doing so very loudly, make a "oooo" sound..   It was like this: "ooooOOOOOOOOOOoooooOOOoo GIRL!   You smell GOOD!" That is when she turned around (along with 3 billion others) and smiled when she saw me standing there, GAP bag in hand, with a puppydawg look on my face.

   We talked in the hall (screw those pedestrians, I was smitten) and I asked her out.  But she was leaving the city in a few hours, and would not be back for weeks, so I asked her out RIGHT THEN.  As in going to eat now.  So, off we went.

   For those of you that know Little Rock, next to the mall, is a U.S. Pizza company about 1/2 a mile away.  We hopped in my car, drove down, and took up a table. 

   From "ooo" to leaving the mall: about 3 minutes. 

   So we sat there, and started chatting.  Nothing heavy yet, just flirty banter.  The waitress came, and took our drink order, left, and had just come back to the table to drop off the drinks.  As the waitress left, my new date glanced behind me, leaned over close to me, and said "UGH! I just hate it when those nigger girls take all my men."

   (I purposelessly jumped into that part, because I really want to convey how soon after we got to the restaurant that she dropped that bomb.)

   I turned, and saw a white guy walking into the joint, with a black girl, hand in hand.  

   What do you say/do/feel, when you meet a new girl, take her to a place to chow on some pies, and she drops this opinion, before you find out anything more than her  first name?  I'm there, Coke in hand, sipping, when she said this, and I'll tell you what I did...  I kept drinking.  I'm sure a diagram would have looked like a pinball machine.  <bong> "Did she just say what I think she... <bong bing> "She DID! wait..  did I hear that righ... <bongbingbing> "Am I being punked?"

<bingbongbingbongbongbongbongbingbingbongbongbingLIGHTS!HORNS! WEEOOOWEEE!!>

   I put down my drink (mainly because I sucked the whole thing down, which would have given me brain freeze, if I had the necessary equipment) and said calmly "I'll be right back", then excused myself to the bathroom.

   So there I am, in the bathroom, just casually leaned back on the wall, wondering what to do.  It was a process of elimination 
     1- Is there anything she can say to redeem herself?
          Nope.
     2- Do I want to keep going with this date?
          Nope
     3- Do I even want her in my car again?
          Nope
 
   The solution was obvious, so I did what may be considered one of the more assholish things I've done in my life.   I left.  I just left.  I walked out of the bathroom, walked outside, got into my car, and drove home. 

   From "ooo" to leaving U.S. Pizza:  about 9 minutes.

   After some time I imagine she sent someone into the bathroom to see if I was OK.  I imagine that the guy that went in there, came out with a puzzled look on his face, and reported that there was no one in there.  I also imagine that her face upon hearing this.  Imagining her face makes me giggle sometimes. 

   Oh, I'm sure she called one of her friends to come get her, or strolled the 1/2 mile back to the mall.  If she did stroll back, I would have loved to have passed her in the same hallway.  If that had happened, I think I would have went "ooooOOOOooOOo" at her again and acted like I just met her.   Not because I would take her out again, but just to see if I could keep a straight face when she yelled at me. 

Greg

  
  
  

Classic. Political. Diversion.

Welcome to what could be an interesting blog post, or the beginning of a hailstorm for me.

Part 1- The ‘incident’

On Wednesday of last week, a CNN political analyst named Hilary Rosen made a comment about Ann Romney (GOP frontrunner Mitt Romney’s wife).  The sound bite that was played over and over was as follows:

Hilary Rosen:  “…guess what, his wife has actually never worked a day in her life.” (1)

                Following those comments (if my math is right) about 2 hours later, Ann Romney responded to Rosen via twitter:

                “I made a choice to stay home and raise five boys.  Believe me, it was hard work”(2)

                The media exploded in the way that only the media can the following day.  Republicans denounced the comment.  Democrats denounced the comment.  A guy in Norway denounced the comment (I’m sure one did….).  The next night, Hilary Rosen went back onto AC360, clarifying her comments.  

                Anderson Cooper: “On the specific things that you said, do you stand by it, saying that Ann Romney hasn’t worked?” 

                Hilary Rosen: “You know, being a stay-at-home mom is a lot of work it’s work inside the home, not outside the home.  She is lucky though, that she had choice, and she referred to that herself.  I admire the way that she talks about her own life.  Many women do not have the choice or the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom.  We have to go and work, and support out children, and like Bay (3) has written  in her pretty meaningful book, many many women are single Moms, doing the same thing…”

The next day, Mitt Romney spoke at an NRA convention in St. Louis (ironically, a city that has a sad and terrible reputation for their gun violence) and unexpectedly <cough-cough> called his wife up to the stage with him.  “There’s one more person I’d like to introduce.  This is a hero of mine.  I happen to believe that all Moms are working Moms, and if you have five sons, your work is never done.  My sweetheart, Ann Romney.”  She then spoke briefly, praising working Moms.  (4)

So there in a nutshell, is the controversy.  The evil liberal media woman is a terrible person, because she doesn't respect Mothers.

Something I’ve said over and over again, is that when you hear what a person has said, you must keep three specific things in mind when making a judgment about the comments.  First, the information the person (and everyone) had at the moment that they made the comment.  Secondly, the context of the comments made, and lastly, what the comments were, in full.  Missing one of those criteria will almost always give you a false impression of the event.  In this controversy, the last two make a huge impact, and luck for us, they are intermingled.  

                The context of the discussion that was going on concerned economics. Polls showed that economic issues where the ones that women were the most concerned about, and also about  reaching out to women on issues of the economy.  Rosen opened that there was not a “War on Women”, and that the only ones using that term were Republicans.  She then said the following line (For those that want to fact check, I’ve provided a LINK (5) so you can follow along):

“With respect to economic issues, I think actually that Mitt Romney is right, that ultimately, women care more about the economic well-being of their families and the like. But there's -- but he doesn't connect on that issue either. What you have is Mitt Romney running around the country saying, "Well, you know, my wife tells me that what women really care about are economic issues. And when I listen to my wife, that's what I'm hearing."  Guess what? His wife has actually never worked a day in her life. She's never really dealt with the kinds of economic issues that a majority of the women in this country are facing in terms of how do we feed our kids, how do we send them to school, and how do we -- why we worry about their future.  So I think it's -- yes, it's about these positions and, yes, I think there will be a war of words about the positions, but there's something much more fundamental about Mitt Romney. Because he seems so old-fashioned when it comes to women. And I think that comes across. And I think that that's going to hurt him over the long term. He just doesn't really see us as equal.”(6)

                Kind of changes things, when you know what they were talking about, and read the full context, huh?

Part 2 – What do you think, Mitt?

                I’d like to do something that has never been done before.  Are you sitting down?  I want to point out where Mitt Romney…   flip-flopped.  Oh yes!  I’m serious! <rolls eyes>   I take you to January 4^th, where in Manchester New Hampshire, Senator John McCain gave his endorsement of Mitt Romney.  I’m going to type out a transcript of the portion where I’ll perform this ah-MAZing feat, but feel free to click HERE and follow along.

               Minute marker 40:10
            (Responding to a question about welfare and unemployment) 

Romney: “… I also like the idea that people who are receiving assistance, welfare assistance, have the responsibility of working.  In my state, we made good progress in that regard, following the days of the Welfare Reform Act but then when I was Governor, 85% of the people on a form of welfare assistance in my state, had no work requirement, and I wanted to increase the work requirement.  I said, for instance, that even if you had a child two years of age – you need to go to work.  And people said ‘that’s heartless’, and I said no no, I’m willing to spend more for daycare, to allow those parents to go back to work.  It’ll cost the state more providing that daycare, but I want the individuals to have the dignity, of work, and get people back into the workforce.” (7)

               

                Fast forward to last week when Mitt Romney now defends stay-at-home Moms, saying as he did in the NRA speech “I happen to believe that all Moms are working Moms.”  Apparently, that isn’t the case.  See, if you are a poor mother, of a child that is as young as two, and need assistance from the state, then working in the workforce is good, for you because the dignity.  However for others, such as his wife, staying at home is being a “working mom”. 

Part 3 – The round up.

               

                Get this fake BS out of my face. 

                Polls all over this country are showing that women are concerned about economic issues.  Mitt, you don’t need your wife to tell you that, in fact I know you have a team of advisors telling you that the economy is important, and the way that I know that is that from day one in your campaign launch, you spoke about how President Obama made the economy worse (newsflash – he didn’t).  What Rosen was saying, and I think it’s obsessively clear, is that your barometer on the issues of economics, and how women feel about that, should not be your wife.  You are worth a quarter of a billion dollars, Mr. Romney!  Do you think the conversation your wife is having about the economy is remotely close to the conversation going on around kitchen tables tonight on the economy?   Read Rosen’s comment again : Rosen : “Guess what? His wife has actually never worked a day in her life. She's never really dealt with the kinds of economic issues that a majority of the women in this country are facing in terms of how do we feed our kids, how do we send them to school, and how do we -- why we worry about their future.”

                Imagine three situations.  The first is a single mother of 3, working 40 hours a week at a minimum wage job, where she asks for as much overtime as she can get.  She does this not because she loves the work, but because the bills and rent and grocery money fights in a zero sum game.   – The amount of money she has to spend in a grocery store is directly tied to the amount of her electric bill.  If the electric bill is $5 less than it was last month, then she can buy $5 more of food to feed her kids.   Imagine another mom that is a middle class stay-at-home mom.  Her husband makes $40,000 per year, and she stays at home raising her three kids.  She doesn’t have to live hand to mouth as much anymore, because she clips coupons, and buys food in bulk.  The $40,000 is the same brought in, if both she and her husband were working $20,000 a year jobs, which would easily put her in the same financial bracket as the Mom in the first situation.   She tends to the kids, cooks, cleans, makes sure they brush their teeth, and is worried about the college fund.  Now, imagine a woman that has 5 kids, in a family that has never needed to clip coupons, has multiple homes, multiple cars, and lives in a family worth…Millions. 

                Now, in all three of those, the mothers are hard at work all the time.  I was raised by a stay-at-home mom for years, and that certainly couldn’t have been easy.  All three Moms are trying to make their children into the best adults that they can, but as the economic situation improves, that burden becomes less and less burdensome.  No one has said that Moms don’t work hard.  No one has said that raising 5 kids was easy on Ann Romney.  The point that Rosen was making was that if Ann Romney has never had a job (workforce job) nor the need for a job, in her entire life, then she can’t understand the economic hardships such as the daily struggle to providing food, providing clothing, and preparing a child for the future.  She has never faced the economic worry of the previous two women, where a sale on skim milk brings a small sigh of relief. 

                Mitt Romney himself -just three months ago- wasn’t singing the tune “all Moms are working Moms” when he wanted to put the ones in need of assistance back into the workforce.  He preferred to put the kids in daycare, so that those Moms could go and become “working Moms” and generate a products, which translate to tax revenue (and help pay for your welfare).   Where was his love and support then?  Oh, I forgot it wasn’t politically convenient at that time to defend a woman.
 

                I’d like to point out one more thing, which I’m sure the political heads reading this picked up on.  (I like to teach the “science” behind campaigns.)  Do not think, for a moment, that Ann Romney’s tweet was a knee jerk reaction, or that the comment was so heinous that it demanded a response.  That was her first tweet, it was a few hours after the comment, and it was the perfect fake outrage media cycle to introduce her to this general election.  Understanding the mentality of a Presidential election campaign is to know that media relations leaps of that magnitude are agreed upon.  Only the flukes slip by.  This was not a fluke.  There was a rapid meeting that came to the conclusion that this would be beneficial to the Romney 2012 campaign. 

               

                The sad part of this little fake outrage, is this – In the beginning, when Anderson Cooper asked Hilary Rosen the question, he outlined the polls saying that women were concerned about the economy.  That was his question, and the context of Rosen’s response.  Now look at the past week.  Where did that issue get addressed? 

                Classic. Political. Diversion. 

-Greg

               

               

(1)  CNN- Anderson Cooper 360, Wed April 11^th 2012. http://ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2012/04/11/the-candidates-war-for-women/
(2) Twitter feed @ AnnDRomney Wed. April 11^th 2012 https://twitter.com/#!/anndromney
(3) Bay Buchanan: Bay and her Boys : Unexpected Lessons I Learned as a (Single) Mom
(4) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Tinph1gbU0  I only mention the first five minutes of his speech)
(5) Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_BRWBUVhyc
(6) Text lifted from : http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/article/2012/apr/13/context-hilary-rosens-comment-ann-romney-never-wor/
(7) C-Span feed of endorsement, Jan 2^nd, 2012  http://www.c-spanvideo.org/program/303512-1

The thing most people don't get about the sex.

I am posting this here, only to serve as a first thought.  I want to re-write and expand this, but for now, it will serve as a canvas where I’ll edit and write from.   So yes, there are lots of random thoughts and grammatical mistakes, but I don’t care for now. I just wanted to pour my thoughts out.  A task that is hard to do, with the….”emotions” talking about this stirs.  =)

          

                I’m sure that when I use this term, there are many people that are trained in psychology and sociology that will tell me I’m using the term incorrectly.  However, no one fitting those qualifications has corrected me, so I’ll keep referring to myself as a "highly functional sexual addict".  Now I’m sure those words have certain connotations, so I shall now explain what I mean.  Also, what I’ll explain has a purpose in the outside world, and I’ll apply it later.

                I’m a highly functional person, in that I’m active in writing, video making, reading, having fun and all the groovy things attributed to being a pleasant extrovert.  There, that was easy enough.  Where that definition expands, is in the sexual addict term.  Now, there are several levels of “insert tab A into slot V” that I can think of, be it fucking or sex or making love.  Regardless of if you are in love with someone you can experience all three.  In or out of love, you can have sex (and there is nothing wrong with that, sometimes you just want a good shag).  You can FUCK (again, nothing wrong, and who doesn’t want to have their naughty bits hammered away on once in a while?).  There is also the one I’ll talk about, and that is making love. 

                Making love for me has a completely different meaning than for most.  Most people think of Barry Manilow on the turner, with rose pedals on the bed or some other horse shit. For me, it’s far less about what you are listening to or what you are laying on than the all encompassing universe of the loving. 

                Many times, it’s better when the lights are off, because what you lose in visual stimulation is made up for with a heightened sense of touch, and I like that.  When I can see a woman’s body, many times I memorize every curve or freckle or crevasse with my eyes, but they stay with me longer when I involuntarily memorize then with my fingertips and lips.  Young cats don’t get that.  I certainly didn’t when I was young.  Music also only has a partial effect, in my opinion, while creating that universe.  I’ve make love and an entire artist’s catalog has played, and I couldn’t tell you who it was.  It wasn’t a part of that universe. 

                What WAS a part of that universe, was that for those hours, every single thing that happened in the universe happened right there between us.  I may know that it is 3 a.m. on a Saturday night, but that fact that is “time” has no place or room to exist in my reality.  The same goes for how much money there is in either my pocket or in the world.  It simply doesn’t exist.  Everything…that…is, is there on;ly because we create it- like galaxies forming stars.  I’m not trying to be aware of the sounds she makes, but I am aware of them as I hop around to all the special areas that I know she fancies: the back of the neck, or slope of that neck, the chest, or where the elbow bends.  The fingertips or small of the back or lower belly and hip bones or the base of the buttocks and back of the knees inner thigh…  the toes.  I’m not mapping them out as places needing to have a check by their location; it’s simply a part of my natural movements. 

                Now, this is important…  Each of the actions performed will have a different desired effect, at different times, and at different times.  Pulling her hair while we are making out will have a different effect as pulling her hair while we’ve been naked and lustily kissing for hours, which will have a different effect if I pull while I’m tasting her, and yet a different effect if I do so while pounding her from behind (or any of the thousand other times that one may pull another’s hair).  What I mean by “at different times, and at different times” is that pulling your lover’s hair while tasting her (which I’m assured by my female friends isn’t commonly done nearly long or often enough for their needs) today and two weeks from now may have completely different effects.  Maybe it’s a certain time of the month, or she was in a terrible mood 2 days ago, or maybe she is mad about work… all of these things can alter the desired effect of that *tug*.  So that tug tonight at the moment when she cums in your mouth, may feel to her completely different then tugging at that same moment weeks from now.  That is when the older men have an advantage, because we have experience in understanding that, and can adapt to it, to help corral all those exploding emotions into a central focal point, and help to get both of us to that place where time doesn’t stop- it simply doesn’t exist.  The outside world doesn’t exist.  The day and time and money and friends and family and troubles and even air slips from your mind, and dissipates like condensation on a cold glass of water.   Things really do fall apart. 

                I do like to listen to the sounds.  The soft or heavy breathing.  The moans, or when her voice cracks.  I like it the most when she breathes in, just as I (for example) roll my tongue over her wetness, and the muscles in her chest seize, and she can’t breathe, and then you hear those small tight quick inhales and then a loooong one as they release their hold on her lungs.  (If you don’t’ know what I’m talking about, then I’m sorry for you.)

                My point, is that all of these things creates a situation that is pure ecstasy, and if done correctly, will last for an amount of time that you will not be able to understand.   

                I’ve been lucky enough to have been with four women in my life that I’ve had these moments with. In fact I was with one ex for a rather long period of time, and never felt like that, and just accepted it.  Not anymore.  I have to have those experiences in my life.  Many times I’ve been on a single date, and brushed her off because I was positive that we’d never connect that way.  Other times, I’ve been out with someone that I was sure that we would connect in that way, but she lost interest.  (One of those rare moments, I was actually attracted to a blondie, believe it or not…)  But I must have those, so I soldier on, looking for my ecstasy. 

                I at least have had the chance to be with those, not like some who are so ice cold or emotionally unavailable or closeted that they will never have a fair chance to feel what I feel.  That is sad.